335. - Mattiel

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week, Jason. Does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. Oh, it's an overcast Thursday in Los Angeles. Jason and I had a big night out in the town last night. How are you feeling, Chief? I feel good. working out literally 60 seconds ago. Wow, straight from Equinox to the lab to lay down yet another classic. Not Equinox. I was just pulling. Oh, you were just pulling. I'm sorry. I thought I was talking to Jay-Z. It's all good, Roy. It's all good. So you were just nose over toesing a little bit? You're talking about toes to the nose, not knees over toes? That's my HB style. I was hoping you were getting so deep in the stretch that your nose was literally over your knee as well as your toe. Do you understand what I'm describing? I know, yeah, like a ballerina's stretch, you mean. Yes, for the amount of stretching. and mobility work you do, I think one day I would love to see you kind of walk on to the NYC Ballet if they can... you know, make a point shoe in your size. I think that could be a miracle as well. I don't know. I think my time might be up. Time's up. Time's up for TJ. My ballet dreams. Um, you know, a lot of therapy has gone into kind of getting through that. It's been a tough journey and for you to bring that up now is a little fucked up, but I'm sorry. I know we're trying to work and I don't mean to get you in your feelings like that. No, it's all good, man. It's all good. Whatever. No, Chris, it's whatever you want to do. But yeah, we had, we had a nice.

sushi dinner oh something very cool happened at that sushi dinner do you remember chris um where you and i had uh dinner at 7 p.m oh i made a rare chris black error and arrived 30 minutes late because 34 minutes late well so i talked to i talked to Shira, who works at the company that manages snail mail, and she's like, all right, so... Shira. Mrs. Mail is on at... Mrs. Maisel? Mrs. Maisel. Last season, not very good. Lindsay's on at 9.15. And in my head, I'm like, okay, that means I should adjust dinner from 7 to 7.30 because we don't need to be there that early. And you did adjust it. Just only for me. Only for me. I forgot to... You wanted to let me know that the dinner was at 7, but in your mind, for you, I'm like, I'm going to show up at 7.30. So then I texted you about 7.15 with, you know, it was probably a hilarious, perfect animated GIF describing my situation. It was a good Drake animated GIF. Luckily, I know that your name rings bells at Shintaro, and they'll keep the Sapporo's flowing and the albacore crispy onion warm no matter what, no matter how late your guest is. Just keep this sushi warm, guys. Yeah, he's still not here. And then all the servers were kind of gathering around like, oh, no. He's getting stood up again. Do you think a lot of people get stood up at Shintaro? It doesn't seem like really a date spot. No, it's definitely a date spot, and people do get stood up there. I've stood many people up at Shintaro over the years. Yeah, I'm sure you left some DJ bros on red at Shintaro. I've hidden in that kitchen many a time. Not tonight. I got to hide. Yeah, I apologize for being tardy for the party. That's very rare, and it's not even something I can blame on traffic. Or the usual LA stuff. It was just your Alzheimer's. Strictly well, I had just come from a workout with my buddy Roy, who... Really put me through the paces over in WeHo. Do you think Roy listens to this podcast? What's cool about Roy is he didn't even know what this podcast was. And I was like, that's why you're my man. Fuck you, Roy. You can train this dick. He's like, I didn't know that. I thought you were just an athlete. And I'm like, well, athlete first. No way. He didn't say that. No, he didn't say that. Athlete first, podcaster second is kind of how I think about myself. We did some nice mobility work and training, but he's got this very cool setup in his apartment.

Because it's got, like, double high ceilings. I, too, have a home gym. You can check it out on The Strategist. It went viral during the coronavirus. That's before COVID. Your Riker-style home gym is a little bit less... It's less visually appealing to the layman, but in terms of putting in work, it's much more brolic than whatever pussy-ass setup he has over there. Yeah, exactly. He has, like, the skiing thingy. Come on. But he's got the full kettlebells, the full weights. He's got the skier. I got all those in the back of the truck, bro. Pull up. I got the thang in the truck, bro. Yeah, your truck is looking a little messy. I saw you cleaning your rug, but did you clean the bed? Wrong. That's the question. My whole car has been self-detailed yesterday. Suck it, loser. Self-detailed is really some broke boy shit, but I know you're kind of a sucker. I don't have the time to wait all day. I'm busy. I'm busy. I'm moving. I'm moving. I got the Clorox. I'm in there with the toothbrush in between. Oh, wow. On the 4Gs. I got the toothbrush on the 4Gs. I see myself in it. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, that's nice. I'm glad you can see yourself in the rear view mirror finally. That's good for safety as well. That's good for safety as well. But, yeah, so I was coming from Roy's. I took a quick shower. I met Jason 30 minutes later than planned at Shintaro. And then we went to the Palladium, which was – I didn't realize how big the Palladium was, but – Yeah, I think it's like a 4,000 cap, something like that. It was fucking big, and it was full. And you know what I learned about – We're proud of Snail. We're proud of Big Snail, one of the greatest How Long Gone graduates and friend of the show. But I thought her crowd was going to be a little freakier. And when I saw her crowd, I was like, Lindsay's about to be rich. It was a little more – I mean, it was like cooler-leaning general population, but general population in the best way where it's just like a mix of – guys and girls of kind of you know a pretty wide age range you're right about the demographic it's like a24 gays who have a disposable income exactly to just spend on uh long long sleeve tees i saw three hereditary shirts in a in one venue you know what i mean that's the power that's the power of snail and a24 combining i was hoping to see some more um to to use lindsey's phrase not mine

Some barnacle dykes over at that show, but not a ton. No, I'm going to have to ask her about that, like what's up with the representation for the barnacles, because I didn't see that. I did see a guy in an Anderson .Paak shirt, which I did report to security, and they said they couldn't remove him just for wearing that shirt, so I was a little upset about that. But it didn't make me lose focus from the set. I was able to enjoy it with other friend of the show. Jake Troth in the building. Whereas I was not able to block that out, and the Anderson Park shirt did, in fact, ruin my night. If I would have paid a price for that ticket... You would have been upset. Small claims court at the very least. I'm not afraid to take it up to a grand jury, Jerry West style. It would have been very cool if you rushed to the box office and demanded a refund because you saw someone wearing a shirt that defended you. Well, first I would rush over to security, and then it would be kind of elementary school style when I wore my tool T-shirt where it had a wrench that resembled a dick and balls. Of course, of course. And then they'd make you turn it inside out at lunch. You would have made the guy. I would have made him flip it inside out, yeah. Hey, Chief. Look, you have two options. You can get on the next lift out of here. Or we'll flip it inside out and let you stay. We won't let you do the encore, but you can stay to the last song. That Free National shirt is going to need to be turned inside out. It feels racist. I don't know why. Free National doesn't sound great to me. It's offending my friend. Yeah, man. We're going to have to take that off. But, yeah, it was another classic Hollywood night with some live music. We've been catching a lot of live music lately. But tonight. We're actually going to catch a fellow podcast duo whose set time is troublingly late. I know gay people party, but 9.30 set time? Do you think I'm 22? Celebrity Book Club. We've had both Lily and Steven on the show. They're both really funny. Their podcast is a good one if you have never listened to it and you're looking for some How Long Gone adjacent people. Doors at 8.

Show at 930. What's going on there, Chris? Like, do I need to go? I mean, that means. 9.30 is when I should be winding down. I know. The performance should be over. I should be waiting at the valet. I should be dragging you out because you've been over-served. Something should be happening besides the performance. You know what I mean? At that time, I'm going to power through for them, but us playing to go to Erewhon Silver Lake for a bite before eating at Erewhon at 8 p.m. I mean, what? 8 p.m. is like I have to go to a real restaurant now. I don't know if I can go to air. That's fine. You want to pivot? We'll fucking pivot. Look, bro. I'm not. No, no, no. We don't have to. But doesn't that feel strange to you a little bit? It does. It does. When I guess my tone when I said that was wrong. I am happy to pivot. I wasn't really. We can kind of offline some options. We can offline some options. Oh, yeah. So we do have a guest today. We have a. band from the ATL, Jason. Mattel, I think is how you say it. What do you think? Mattel? I mean, it has two Ts. I mean, you just said it like the toy company, which I don't think they'll be too happy about. We're going to find out. Mattel? Mattel is the birth name of the front woman. Jonah is the producer and multi-instrumentalist. They got a new record out on ATL here. in the good old United States called Georgia Gothic, which is an interesting title. That was you in middle school, right? Yeah. You're a little fat ass. Bitch. Got the Marilyn Manson XXXL on deck. Georgia Gothic and it's just me. In that picture I sent you, me, fat me in the drawers t-shirt with an X on my hand. Unfortunately, we could probably Photoshop that into a more gothic t-shirt if you wanted. All good. It's all good. All right. Well, let's give them a Zoom. We have so much to cover, don't we? We have so much to cover. Let's get it fucking popping, Jason. How long gone? Okay. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web. So do our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues, maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world, writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly. A website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative but also business-minded.

Jason, there's one place to go for that, Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could, you know, have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools so those future graduates can find me. And, you know, I'm able to accept, quote, unquote, donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going. Raise some money. Show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early. And we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional as your competition, if not more. So head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. the news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world and i know you particularly have quite a lot of questions a lot of questions but how often because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot how many times do they do three times a week and i i have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do that's just a guess the guardian is not some billionaire owned platform they're not afraid to say what they want to say brother yeah rupert ain't sniffing around in in what uh journalists kai wright and carter sherman are up to over there at uh stateside but yeah listen wherever you get your podcast you can watch it on youtube it's three times a week and and who couldn't use more news you know especially especially when it's when it's not you know from here let's say give it give it a listen give it a listen Oh, this is huge for me personally. This episode of How I'm Gone is brought to you by TaskRabbit. Oh, baby, let me tell you something. This is not a joke. I use TaskRabbit a lot because I can't do anything. You need some art hung? TaskRabbit. You need a fucking something put together? A cabinet? Got to reach that cheese grater on the top shelf? TaskRabbit. Anything you need, TaskRabbit can take care of it for you.

How it works, TaskRabbit connects you with skilled taskers in your area. They can help you move. They can assemble furniture, repairs, yard work, mounting, and more. You can search for a tasker based on cost, skill set, availability, and past client reviews so you know exactly who's showing up and can have confidence that they know what they're doing because taskers have assembled over 3.4 million pieces of furniture, completed 700,000 home repairs. handled 1.5 million moves, and the numbers are just going up, Jason. Yeah, throw a little money at the problem. It's not so expensive, and that job that you really don't want to do is something that another person out in the world is very good at doing and would gladly do it in exchange for a little bit of money. So when life happens, your to-do list grows. Get ahead of it now and get $15 off your first task at TaskRabbit.com or grab the TaskRabbit app. using promo code howlong. Taskers book up faster, especially for same-day tasks. So book Trusted Home Help today. That is $15 off your first task using promo code howlong with the TaskRabbit app or at TaskRabbit.com. All right, guys. First of all, let's get started here. We need a proper pronunciation just because I don't want to fuck this up, so I would love to hear it from you. It's Mateel. Mateel. Okay, okay, okay. Chris, I owe you five grand. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, we had a wager on that, but I'm glad that we cleared that up up front. Where are you guys coming to us from? Atlanta. Atlanta, Georgia. Oh, you guys, I thought you were, for some reason, I thought you were in, like, Germany or something right now. You guys did, like, a U.S. run and then taking a couple weeks off and then you're doing Europe is what's going on? Yeah, exactly. Chris hates Germany. How do you guys feel about that? What part? Berlin. Just the whole country? Okay, okay. Berlin, mostly. I don't understand the hype. If you guys have had a great time there, I'm always willing to be convinced. You know what I mean? I don't think you do. So you let me know. Did you have a bad time there? Yes, I did have a bad time there. Really? Oh, shit. He doesn't like riding bicycles. He doesn't like techno. I didn't even OD. Like, I didn't even, nothing bad actually happened. I just, it's something, I got there and I was just like, instantly, this ain't for me.

And I couldn't shake it. I don't know if that happens to you. You may have been too artistic for him. Yeah, exactly. But if you guys like Germany, I would love to hear a case for Stuttgart. Oh, man. I've heard a lot of people are really stoked about Munich, actually. Munich is trending right now? Yeah. Okay. Are you going to go on record? Am I going to go on record with that one? Yeah. Yes, I am, because I know. Okay. Damn, she said I'm an expert on Munich trending. That's fine. I'm willing to check it out. I've heard the airport is very chic. No, Frankfurt has a nice airport because that's where Lufthansa. If you ever fly Lufthansa, it'll take you right through Frankfurt. This guy, you got the full suite in Lufthansa or like you just doing the regular? Okay, I didn't know. No, I'm actually, I'm regular degular. It's a pretty. It's a casual flight. It's not first class. You guys have Delta status, I'm assuming? Jonah does. No, it's not status. I mean, what does it even mean to have Delta status? What does it even mean, bro? It's not existential. Like philosophically speaking? No, I mean, what do you get out of it? I don't mean heady-wise. I mean, quite literally, what does it mean? Oh, you want to know some of the perks of being a Delta? Frequent flyer? Chris would love to show you all the packages. Yeah, if you guys... I don't work for Delta, but as a Diamond Medallion member, I can share some of the insights that we receive. Who's the voice we're not hearing? Who's the voice that we're not seeing? That's your publicist? No, Jason. Who's Jason? I'm Jason. Where's your video? He's got his shirt off. It's kind of a thing that he does. I don't have my shirt off. I was just working out and my shirt's all sweaty and gross. But you guys don't care, right? Wait, do you care? We don't care. Actually, it's not that sort of. See, it's only a little bit. You've got to raise your arms up. Oh, she said show me the pits. All right. All right, freak. Damn, she requested pit shots. You're a nasty freak. Damn, she's nasty. I'm used to feet stuff, but not pit stuff. That's too far. Oh, yeah. Back to Delta, just quickly. Some more important stuff. It's mainly, look, we're looking for, obviously, you guys are on the road. You need lounge access. You know what I mean? Because you can't be slumming it with the normies. No. That's a bad look for you guys. Well, what's the point of flying if you have to do that? That's a great point. I've never met someone else.

I've never met someone I align with so well on these things. But also, you guys probably have a lot of gear and stuff. You know what I mean? So obviously the bags are all free. You know, it's nothing to show up with four guitars, you know, a pedal board. You're good to go. You're walking right through. Yeah, yeah. And then, of course, the upgrade program. You know, you're going to get bumped up. Maybe not on the flight to Frankfurt, but on the flight to, you know, New York maybe. Yeah, for sure. Or some more of a local, you know what I mean? Complimentary overnight oats. You guys like that? We still get full-on meals. We get three-course meals on the way to New York. It's a two-hour flight, too. Wow. Okay, big. You get a cheese course? You get a cheese course? Damn, that's pretty nice. I didn't know that's what you were working with. But yeah, there's some perks to it. But it's also cost me quite a lot of money. So I'm not sure if it's actually worth it. You know what I mean? I don't know if you guys like to feel like a VIP, but that's kind of... All right, what is that La Cucaracha sound in the background? Is that you, Chris? Yeah, that's the local food truck pulling up. El Serino, El Strix again. For the construction workers. Okay, so you guys were just on the American tour. You guys did a lot of similar venues that we did on our tour last year. Empty Bottle, Lodge Room here in LA. But you guys did South by Southwest as well. We did not do that. And I was wondering if I could get like a scene report from you guys, because you guys are on the musical side as well as the digital visual art creative side of things. So, you know, how are the shows? How dorky was it? How much did crypto influence it? How bad was the food? Stuff like that. It was great. I mean, I think it was better than other South By's we had done. I mean, they did not have too many COVID protocols and we ended up getting COVID at South By. So I don't blame the institution, but. Okay. We definitely got it. Because everyone in L.A. right now has the Coachella cough. Yeah, we did. But South by Southwest, you guys didn't get COVID? On the way back, we found out. So I think it was like the last show we played. Yeah. Luckily. You guys have short or long COVID? It was short. Pretty short. It literally lasted like, I don't know, five days or something. We also have 20 vaccines between the two of us. Is that an exaggeration, Jonah?

So you're protected. You're protected. You felt good. But, I mean, you kind of – look, I don't – the amount of socializing I do, I'm just – I'm always expecting to get COVID. You know what I mean? I'm just fine with it. I think other people are – Jason has a whole thing where he's like, we need to just like – This doesn't you can't be mad getting it like it's just like this is what's going to happen. You can't be like, I went to this restaurant and I swear the server had a sniffle and I'm going to hang this man out to dry. You know what I mean? You know, it's weird is they'll call you if you get a covid test and you get it. They'll call you and ask you if you needed money from a work you lost. And I like for two seconds, I thought about it, but I was like, no, it's OK. It's OK. But I guess there's like a I think there's a government thing that provides cash for like. COVID survivors. Wait, so like if you get like an actual test that's like a sanctioned test somehow and it comes up positive. Just a CVS. It doesn't have to be sanctioned. It's just CVS. Right. But I mean, if you're in some system somewhere, they'll give you a phone call and be like, you are eligible for a little baggie because you might. Okay. Yeah. I did not get that. We were slated to go to London for that week and then we couldn't because we had COVID and then miraculously all of the hotel uh, reservations and flight reservations were like, Oh yeah, sure. Here's your money back. No fucking problem. Like, no issue there. Uh, all of a sudden, like that's never been the case. They'll just take your money. Yeah. The, the flight stuff is crazy. You can just change shit now. And they got to stop soon. Cause they love taking our money. They got it. They got to go back to where it's like, you get penalized for everything you do. Yeah. I talked to Delta last week and they were just like, dude, why don't you just cancel it? It was literally like, why are you on the phone? Just cancel it. It's easy. And I was like, yeah, you're right. This is the one good part about these unprecedented times. Take advantage of it. We've just decided not to screw you over now. What a concept. All of that, all of the stuff where you call somebody is strictly, I've been going through a little battle with the LA Power Company. DWP?

No, not Department of Water and Power. SoCal Gas. There was some issues at our house. Gas issues. My point is I had to hire a guy to come do some kind of lightly illegal stuff to get the gas back on because I was – Yeah, yeah. You're a lawbreaker. I can tell you guys break the law. Well, I think gas companies are a sham. I think when you get a random fucking like service charge or whatever. Speak on that, Jonah. And they're just like – $40 extra on my gas bill. And I'm like, for what? I've never even seen this person. So I've been struggling with the gas company, and I finally got a good person on the phone, and it changed the whole experience. You know what I mean? It really depends on who you get on the phone. They all have the same amount of power. Brown, are you chugging a little kind of ginger shot type of thing going on over there? Oh, yeah. And you know... What the greatest thing is, is it comes in a little glass bottle. And then I can use this for my shampoo when I go overseas. And I don't have to. Okay. Are you a sustainable shawty? Oh, yeah. Absolutely. I started talking about the gas company and my shit just shut off. So something is up. Bro, you got to be careful. That's like what happened to Epstein, right? Yeah. Oh, God. Exactly. Your Zoom connection got suicided. It got suicided? I was just talking about breaking the law a little bit. I don't know if you guys... We've broken many laws, I think, over the course of this American tour. I can't even count. Were you pissing on the street a lot or just some more kind of middle-of-the-road stuff? Do you travel with a gun? What's going on? You forget that peeing on the street is illegal. Yeah, what are you... Only driving through the South do I get nervous. Piss towns, we call them. Yeah. I miss driving through the South, to be honest. I don't know, and it's... It's fun to show people that haven't seen it before how crazy the billboards are. You know what I mean? Because we're all used to all that stuff, all the pro-gun kind of anti-abortion stuff that people pay. I want to know who's paying for that is really my question. Is it just the church, you know, quote unquote? It's probably the same people paying for it. You know what I mean? Because they're all kind of the same quality.

And they're getting a little bit better, but like, you know what I mean? It's like, it looks like the same writers. They have the same copywriters, same color story, same art directors, branding guidelines. Yeah. I like the ones that you see and like somebody's cornfield and you know that the person that owns the cornfield is probably the one who put it up because it's like made of corn cardboard and hand painted. It's like hand painted. God is real. Yeah, yeah. A hand-painted God is real in the bowels of South Carolina really lets you know that that farmer means fucking business. Yeah, he means it. I like that. I do, too. The handmade quality, the artisanal quality of that kind of signage makes me feel something more than these corporate billboards. You know what I mean? I don't need to see another Fast and Furious billboard, right? Right. I want my billboards grass-fed. Pasture raised, brother. Brother Jonah. Brother Jonah wants a pasture raised billboard. I like that. That's a new. Cage free. You can't cage me, Biden. This man spent 40 hours. Painting, hand painting this thing. Got to take it seriously. Jonah, you could probably hang a sign outside of your house if you got, I don't know how much acreage you got over there, but you know. Yeah, you guys in the country or in the city? We're from the country, kind of, but we both live in Atlanta. We live like a mile from each other. Oh, okay, okay. What kind of country are we talking about, Chief? Are we talking about Cumming? Are we talking about Dalton? We're talking about a damn goat farm, right? Yeah, I come from, I come from, I don't have neighbors type country. Who the neighbors type shit. The neighbors were some cows. You're a real country chick. You've really done a good job. I think of myself as a country chick as well. But I've lived in these major metropolitan areas for so long that I feel like I've kind of disconnected from my roots. In a way that I don't really like, you know what I mean? Because now being Southern is kind of in vogue, if you will. It's a little sexier than it used to be. You think so? Oh, yeah, man. Yeah, your accent? Are you kidding? It's just a nice little touch. Do you have any examples of the South being sexy again? The South will rise in sexiness yet again?

No, I mean it's just – Give me some examples, Chris. What's going on? I just mean there was a time where it was like there was no discussion. It was just instantly like you're a dumb redneck. You're the hillbilly butt of every joke kind of thing. Yeah, exactly. America's armpit. The list goes on. And I think now it's a little bit more like you're seeing Nashville is cool, which is obviously a stretch. That's the media. That's not me. Right. But Nashville is cool. Atlanta is cool. Charleston is cool. I'll read a story about fucking Birmingham having a renaissance, for God's sakes. You know what I mean? Miami's the most expensive city in America. Right. It's true. Atlanta has a lot of celebrities walking around now, too, because of their movies and stuff. So I guess technically on paper it's sexier in that way. You guys doing any Dumois-style sightings over there in Atlanta? Yeah. Give me a few. What do you got? Dude, I sold a necklace to Catherine Zeta-Jones at the antique store I worked at in 2017. I don't know what the fuck y'all have been doing. Okay, so stuff like that. Yeah, I don't know what y'all have been doing, but that's what I was doing. Jonah's like, I flipped the chain to Catherine Taylor-Jones. Yeah, I didn't know if you'd seen Luke Wilson doing Coke at Elmira or something. You know what I mean? Because that's a little more reasonable. He's like, actually, yes, I am. The Wilson brothers are around a lot, actually. I know. They walk around. They're around. I know. I keep hearing that, and I'm like, how many movies can these guys make, or do they just move here? They probably live here. I don't really think they make movies anymore. Yeah, I'm sure they're producing. Oh, yeah. Owen Wilson will always be. Yeah, he's a legend, Jason. Don't do that. Well, speaking of ATL, is it true that if you kind of want to, I mean, like you're selling chains out of the trunk, you know, kind of doing whatever it takes to put food on the table. So if you want to make it up out of the mud in Atlanta, is it true that your only options are kind of trapping basketball or MailChimp? Yeah, basically. Well, now Mailchimp's like not even, it's just an insurance company. What do you mean? What do you mean? They sold for $12 billion to Intuit. $12 billion? I don't know. How did I miss that or did I forget? Was that recent? It was like last year, yeah. You got any stock options or anything or how are we looking? No. No. Zilch. No. So you got fucked on the stock options. They don't do equity in the South, Chris. They did a nice profit sharing for a while.

Okay, so you're going to like that one day. That was good. So you worked there, or not both of you, just you? Yeah. And you were a graphic designer? Yes, I worked there for six years on the design team there. So you had a full career while you were? Oh, yeah. So do you guys still work, or is it music full-time? I mostly am doing this, but I have some freelance stuff come up now and then that I'll do. What about you, Jonah? Jonah's got some shit in his trunk right now he's trying to unload. How much for the QP? I don't want to brag or anything, but I am. I am Catherine Zeta's number one guy now. She kind of calls me when she needs pieces. You know what I mean? I do music for fun. I do music for fun. Well, music, it's my first love. I do it for free, and I do. And Catherine kind of keeps your pockets lying. Exactly. That's right. That's a good approach. I was always – I knew a lot of people who worked at – there's, like, nowhere else to work in Atlanta if you want to make real bread and, like, do something creative, right? That's what I've always been – that's what I've always understood. It's true. Well, yeah, and there were only a few golden years where that was an option, really, yeah. What do people do now? You just have to kind of – They open sweet greens, Jason, so there's a lot of room for salad experts kind of to get in the door over there. I mean, I designed a sweet green salad, and it's being delivered to me right now. As soon as we're – This podcast is my lunch, and then I'll have that salad for dessert. Well, if you are a designer, is that kind of why you named your album after a font? Named album after a font? What are you talking about? Georgia Gothic feels like a typeface that I have in my collection. Oh, yeah. You're totally right about that. No, it's not the reason, but, yeah, you're right. So you never put that together? I don't know why. I mean, I listened to the record. I saw the artwork, and I was like, okay. gothic you guys are on the cover with some red patent leather you're holding devil's pitchforks so i was like okay that's the gothic vibe and then i heard you're a graphic designer and i was like georgia gothic does sound like you know an adobe creative font i don't know if it's of any interest to you but the typeface is called clavichord and i don't know if that matters oh she said she said bitch what do you know about fonts

She said, I'll cut this typeface myself like your neck. I was on thefonts.com when you were in diapers, sweetheart. But I do like the name of that typeface. Clavicle, you said? Clavicle. Clavicle. Clavicle. Isn't that like your bone here? Yeah, that's a sexy name for a typeface. That's a little too sexy for a typeface. Are you buying fonts or are you getting them on the low? You know what I'm saying? Well, that one I used. with permission, and the man was very nice who invented it. He even sent me a nice email and thanked me for using it on the cover. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, I guess it's different when it's, like, album artwork. You kind of have to... Is there, like, a code of ethics for font borrowing, kind of? Yeah, kind of. It's pretty much, like, a gray area, but you should usually buy it and get the rights to it. Yeah, that's... I've always learned, like, if you're going to use this for, like, your thing thing, then yeah, but if it's just for, like... a flyer for a party or something like that then like whatever it doesn't really matter no i'm not giving any more money to new zealand all these fonts are made in fucking new zealand dude and portland too yeah fuck portland fuck new zealand if you're a midwestern font cutter let me know i'd love to put some money in your pocket okay true but it's like what kind of lawyer represents font affairs you know a boring one i guess Intellectual property. Yeah, that's just IP, general IP. But can you imagine going after someone? You're like, I saw your birthday party flyer, and I saw what you fucking used, and I am litigious. I don't care if your daughter is turning three this Saturday. I don't give a shit. Do you have a receipt? I think it's nice to have a designer in the band, though. You know what I mean? That really makes things easier for you guys, I feel like. Having that third party, we have a great creative director over here at How Long Gone that does make things take a little longer. You know what I mean? Jason can only do so much. He's not really kind of as adept as you are, but he tries. There's actually a lot of similarities between Chris and I and you guys in terms of a two-person outfit. The labor is kind of spread out and delegated well. I think Jonah is the Chris of the group, mainly in terms of the baldness.

whereas Brown and I are kind of the graphic front people. You guys, both of you have beautiful hair, I will say that, and that's the only thing you have in common, I'm going to say, unless... We're both members of the Adobe Creative Suite. We're both lyricists. Mateo, how tall are you, though? Because Jason's very tall. Are you clocking at six feet, or what are we looking at? How tall are you, Jason? Six foot nine. Six foot? Nine. Nine? You're six foot nine? What? Did you just turn British? What? Are you joking? All right, Ted Lasso, calm down. Why do you not play basketball? In my formative basketball years, I was a little unathletic. Sheep. Sheep. And I grew up in Orange County, so it was like surfing, skating, BMX. Like the extreme sports were cool, and then like the jocks did. basketball football baseball and but playing basketball is not really a job i don't think of like uh i agree with you now at the time that's how it was now um i was now i'm i think to myself like wow i just walked around high school being clearly the tallest person in the entire school and a basketball coach never once came up to me i'm like why don't you come out and practice with us one time They just took one look at me and like, this guy's a fucking pussy. We're moving on. He'd take one elbow and he would be back on his BMX bike. He's not ready. I used to be the best basketball player in my elementary school. And then when everyone came back from summer and they had hit puberty, and then they started putting a little muscle into my lower back, boxing me out in the paint, as it were. Then I was like, I'm done. Have fun, guys. I'm out of here. Yeah, he's not built for it, but I think that there are some similarities between our duos. But hanging out with you guys on this Zoom is really making me feel like when we were back on tour in the Americas South. It feels like a nice, warm hug. I feel like Chris's mom was going to offer me a bowl of wheat thins very soon. Do you do the Grand Slam at Arden's Garden when you're feeling a little under the weather and you have a vocal performance? Oh, man. The Grand Slam is great except for the wheatgrass. It makes me feel bad. What do you mean?

Yeah, wheatgrass makes me feel a little nauseous sometimes. I know it's good for me, but it makes you feel queasy. Are you like a health goth? Are you really about this shit, or do you just drink juice? I forgot about health goth. No, well, according to Jonah, I eat a lot of junk food. What do we eat, like hot Cheetos or like how bad? Oh, yes. I don't think it's that bad, but yeah, I eat some hot Cheetos. Do you eat them with chopsticks? Or you have long nails? What's going on? Do I what? She said, do I what? That means your fingers would be nasty as hell. Well, like, using my, like, long-ass fingernails to pick up one of the Cheetos, like, little tweezers. Cardi B style. So when you guys are on the road, are you guys kind of, you know, do you consider yourself to be foodies? Are you trying to check out local establishments for your nourishment? Or are you kind of just like letting it rock and eating what's backstage, having some hummus? We had some really good sushi in Milwaukee. Was it Milwaukee? They do not have good sushi in Milwaukee. Good sushi in Milwaukee? What the hell? Isn't that crazy? That seems like a riddle. It is. It is crazy. So you had the catfish omakase? Yeah. We had Catfish 12 Ways in Milwaukee. It was lit. That's good. I bet that show, I bet you felt real good on stage in Milwaukee after that. It was great. We had a great show. Did you guys have a good show in Seattle? We had a great show in Seattle. It was kind of a surprise to us. The crowd was really good. Seattle was cool. We sold out the last time we played, and then this time I think we had a little less. amount of people, so that was like... Wait, that's not how it's supposed to go, Chief. I know, I know. No. No shit. No shit. There's pre-COVID and post-COVID, but San Francisco grew real big. The venue we played was a lot bigger and a whole lot more people came out. It was really cool. Fuck San Francisco. Fuck those nerds. Why? Oh, because of the techies. We played San Francisco and the ticket sales were good. The merch sales were good. Those motherfuckers did not crack smiles for a solid hour. You guys got a different crowd. Were your fans rocking out? Oh, yeah. I have...

Documentation, yes. I have proof. You're really into proof. I like that about you. No fake news. I have a Dropbox folder. No fake news around here. No fake news. Jonah, when you're traveling, where do you hide the weed? Where do I hide it? Yeah. I don't know. I'm going to expose myself. TSA does not listen. TSA does not listen. It was in the amp. It was in the amp this last time. But not going into Canada. Not going into Canada. They don't let you take it over. They don't let you take it back in. Canadian customs is a tricky one. Both of you guys are smoking loud. Is that correct? Yes, dank loud. Actually, quick side note question. When you're traveling with merch into Canada... What's the move there in terms of – Dude, are you a cop? Like, what are these questions? No, we're – Promo. Promotion. Where's the weed? Where's the merch? These are literal questions they ask at the border. Yeah, next time we cross the border, they're going to be like, we listen to this podcast, so we know exactly where you're hiding the weed. Look, guys, we do have quite a large following. I don't think we dip into the TSA or the FBI, but you never know. What do they ask you all? If you go play Vancouver or Toronto, what do they ask you all? Well, that's why – I mean, we're asking because we have a show. next month in toronto and i'm like what do we do with the merch is do we ship it do we bring it with us okay if you have like t-shirts and like records i don't know what you sell just say it's promotional which biggest promo t-shirts we're giving it away we're giving it all away and then they're like that's bullshit yeah you have 75 they believe you well nah it depends on what you're riding we're flying we're flying we're flying with the merch They're going to easily search you. This is fucked. Jason, you're carrying the merch and coach, bro. Sorry. Strap the merch to your body. The amp has this weird bag over it in my head. I was like, they're not going to take the bag off. I know the kind of shit you're talking about. You've got a sheath for your amp. Yeah, it's just subtle confusion. It's not like actual. It's like a vintage car that sits outside. It's a little sleight of hand. Jonah, you ever do any magic growing up? Oh, man. You kind of have a magician vibe to you. Really? A little bit.

Oh, man, that's like a weird thing to say. Get used to it, brother. I used to know one magic trick with cards, and I remember thinking magic was really cool. I did see Chris Angel perform at the Rock Hard Cafe. Wait, what is it called? Hard Rock? What's it called? Rock Hard Cafe, bro. Damn, get your mind out of the gutter. Sorry, Rock Hard. Rock Hard Cafe. Oh, my God. I was rock hard watching Criss Angel perform at the Hard Rock Cafe. Okay, so you saw the Mind Freak at the Rock Hard. What city was this in? This was in Times Square in New York City. Oh, hell yeah. It was a beautiful evening. Times Square, New York City, Hard Rock Cafe, front row seats to Criss Angel, Mind Freak. Oh, my God. And he brought my mom on stage, and then my parents got a divorce. I don't know what happened. I was about to say, bro, your mom must be hot. That's a problem. If Chris Angel picks her out of the crowd, damn, bro. How old were you? I was like 10. I was like 10 years old, 10 years old. Yeah, you can't let – Young buck. We've been kind of doing some light research on this show with our guests about how kind of the – what's the guy's name, Jason? The guy that wrote the book about dating? The Mystery Method. The Mystery Method is back. Really? The mystery method is back. Yeah, I think that it's back. I think some people are subscribing to it. And I feel like Chris Angel is like adjacent to that somehow, even if it's just by looks alone. I don't know why I equate these things in my mind. He's a magician and a pimp is what you're saying. And peacocking. That's what it is, right? When you wear the hats and you wear the feathery stuff. What magician isn't peacocking? How do you use that method with Tinder and stuff? Because I feel like that's mainly how people date now. How do you nag on... I mean, I guess people nag on Twitter. That's a great point. You should follow Mystery on Patreon. I'm sure he's got some kind of digital tips. You know what I mean? It's $10 a month. You could still insult people digitally in the chat room. I could be like, hey, your hair looked better when it was blonde. You should bleach it again.

Once you lose the weight, you're going to be so hot. Stuff like that. Did you guys watch The Pickup Artist when it was on VH1? Did I watch The Pickup Artist? It was amazing. It's one of the best shows ever. I got the Blu-rays. You know what I mean? I'm a real fan. There's still conventions. There's a convention that I watched on Channel 5. That thing on Patreon. But they went to a pickup artist convention and this guy does it in Las Vegas. God, I need to go to that. Yeah, we should go to that. What's your guys' meditation style? I know you guys are into a little meditation, right? Mindful meditation. Mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness meditation. Could you explain to Chris what that is? It's like where you breathe and you do a body scan and then you... basically sit there for 20 minutes and count your breaths so body body scan is like if you start with your hair and you go to your nose and eyes and elbows and you just kind of go through yeah yeah how many how many seconds breathing in how many breathing out do one in and one out so you or you just go one two so that's that's an in and out and you go to 10 and you restart okay okay so you don't do like a four seconds breathe in eight seconds breathe out or something like that to lower your heart rate or anything no i don't do that type of i don't know what that's called You're like a regular old one-two. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Ergo in, ergo out. Are you sitting? Because I have a problem with the sitting. You know what I mean? I get a little uncomfortable. My back starts to hurt. Yeah, I like to sit and meditate. Chris, you can do it laying down. I know, but that just seems like a recipe for sleep, and that's a cheating. Well, you can do it at night, and then it really works. And that's like sleep meditation is a thing. Yeah, yeah. Oh, I see. So I'm doing it before bed to kind of lull me into that beautiful dream place, dreamlike state. Yeah. set me off into another world. I truly felt awake but asleep at the same time. I've done a lot of drugs, guys, and I'd never felt like this before. Was it an out-of-body experience? I would say it's kind of out-of-body. It was really fun and really nice.

and really relaxing, but I can't replicate it on my own. I need a leader. Well, they have apps for that. Yeah, they do have apps for that. Do you use an app or do you do this raw dog? I raw dogged it for a while. I started with Headspace, which is huge. Don't shout them out until they give us an ad deal. No, I mean, it's great. I think if anything like that can help you out, it's perfect. One of my main things that I listen to on the road is just Brian Eno's app that just consistently makes... ambient music all day oh i didn't know about this what do you mean he's got an app and it just like yeah it's just it constantly generates new ambient sound and uh it's basically it's good to listen to if you're tired of like podcasts and music and whatever else like i which on the road after driving forever you're like i just want to listen to something that's not that's so it's just like a constant waterfall of new ambient it like makes it itself yeah exactly it's great i love it i'm a little embarrassed i didn't know about that Jason, you should be more embarrassed you didn't know about that. But it's $30. It's $30. That's kind of sick, though. One time or a monthly fee? One time. Okay. I fuck with that. That's cool. If Netflix was just like, give us $800 and we're good for life. Yeah, forever. You're like, yeah, okay, cool. That's an investment in my future. I wonder if they're going to, since they're dying a slow death, maybe they'll pivot to that, Jason. Damn, yeah, they are kind of dying. Ain't that a motherfucker? You guys were very productive during COVID, but Jason watched all those stupid shows. You know what I mean? He's begging for Tiger King season three. During COVID, we made this podcast just the way that they made their album. That's true, that's true. Were you guys on unemployment and you guys didn't have to work and you just hit the cabin and start? Shredding? Because that's what we did with our podcast, No Cabin. But I got shredded in terms of fitness. I thought you said no cabin like people say no cap. I thought you were like... I'm talking about a North Georgia cabin. It's a long-term Airbnb rental.

Yeah, we were both on unemployment. I mean, it was a blessing, man, to just wake up and be like, all right, I have enough money to eat food. Yeah, imagine that, a social experiment where people have a living wage. Hey, hey, don't get political on this show. I'm not giving you a soapbox, okay? Not today, sweetie. Don't call me that. We rented out a cabin in North Georgia, and we wrote this record together and spent a week up there, and we got a lot of good material out of it. I went back to Covington, where I'm from. That's the country. Bro, you're from Covington? God damn. I'm from fucking Covington, dude. I'm from Conyers, bro. No way. I was born in Rockdale County. Oh, that's gang. You're from fucking Conyers, bro? Two down south bald kings are at it again. I went to Heritage Heights. I went to Heritage Heights. Y'all were your fly-ass football team and your fucking good-ass... Theater program. Your theater program was crazy. Oh, wow. Our theater program was crazy. I didn't realize that, actually. Yeah, a good-ass theater program down there. It was, dude. It was. Jonah, what were some of their productions that you find most memorable? Just top five. No, I mean, I didn't like them, but they were just big. Like, they did, like, the musicals. They did, like, Annie and shit. And we were doing, like, plays that we thought were, like, more, like, I don't know. artsy damn i didn't know i didn't know we were known for our production level but that's good to know when did you leave conures i mean i dropped out of high school when i was like 17 and i'm 39 so it's a long and you moved to me i moved to atlanta immediately yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so we i mean i'm probably older than you so we probably didn't we didn't cross paths at that era yeah you're definitely older than me man god damn it i didn't i didn't know yeah i mean that is a yeah covington is is a wild vibe man but it's like cool but yeah but conyers is is awful like isn't covington doesn't have like a square and there's been like a little resurgence it's getting cute yeah they're definitely cutin it up that's called gentrification where i'm from jonah yeah we know but it's not it's not that it's like because it's it's reverse it's like a bunch of white people in covington and that have money that are fine so it's like

not that at all like uh okay and the square of covington has been historically like white and racist so okay this is growth yeah because uh they shot that show vampire diaries there oh see so like they were trying to like do they had so there were there was an injection of money in town because all these people from new york and la so they're like we can we can profit off these losers yeah actually i took katherine zeta there for lunch one day she loved it She loved it. She actually was trying to invest, but I had to kind of get her out of there. She wouldn't kind of stop gushing over the chef. You know what I mean? Right. That's tough. It's really tough. So when do you guys go to Europe? Two weeks? On Monday. No, Monday. Oh, Monday. Yeah. Are you mentally prepared? Yes. I feel better today. I feel better today. Like, literally, I slept well last night, and I was like, okay, I think I can do this. You got the sprinter with the driver with the translator? With the translator on the side? I need a translator, because that's kind of important. German's tough. It's an ugly language. You know what I'm saying? I'm not saying that because I'm biased, but it's not considered one of the beautiful languages. You guys would agree. You don't like Berlin. You hate the language. Yeah, no. Their language is harsh, whereas people think French is beautiful. I don't, because I don't understand it. I like how the Germans have one simple word for a complicated feeling, or they have words for things that... don't exist in the English language. Do you have an example of one of those? Yeah, you're going to have to educate us here. Schadenfreude. You know that. Oh, sure. Okay, yeah, yeah, sure. Okay, yeah. That's a popular. I do like that about those germs. Also, their exits are called osphots, which sounds a lot like ass fart. That is important to consider as well. Thank you. Thank you both for joining us. That, to me, just that example right there defines the whole dynamic here. She gives us kind of this thoughtful, you know more high brow take on the german language and you bring up asses uh when you're when you're thinking of the german language the yin and the yang and jonah you're the yang because it rhymes with wang i'm assuming that's just the way it goes we were thinking maybe this podcast is called how long gone how long dong

How long is that? How long is that dong? How long dong? Don't comment on penises on this podcast. That's not what we do here. Like if I want to go. But that's a great premise for my new podcast side project. How long is that dong? We spend an hour finding out exactly how long every guest's penis is. We do a lot of gay baiting on this podcast, but I think we need to take it to kind of the next level and just straight out be like, how big's the hog? And that's a Patreon paywall as well. For $100 a month, we'll give you inches, centimeters, soft, hard, medium soft, medium hard. We can break it down all the way through. Thank you guys for that free business advice because that is kind of invaluable. And I hope you don't. I think you own that IP, because that's just not really happening. From one creative to another, we respect you. We do respect you. God bless. We respect you. So you guys are hitting the road, and the album is in stores everywhere now, correct? Georgia Gothic? It's in Best Buy. It's in your Walmarts. Sam Goody, get it at Licorice Pizza. I can get it at Buddy's. Get it at Buddy's? Mattel, is there a song on the album that you would like us, based on talking to us, Jabronis for one hour. What song would you prescribe for us to play at the end of this episode right now? It's starting to kick in right now. The intro is twangling up. Aww. Well, I think, well, I think Boomerang. Why don't you do Boomerang? That's kind of a deep cut. That probably won't get a whole lot of music. Yeah, do that. Because Chris is a boomer. Got it. Okay, great.